I haven’t spoken a lot about my son’s struggles with bipolar disorder. Maybe because it is not something I want to label him as, but really it’s not a dirty secret. It’s a hard reality we live with each day. Some days are better than others, some days I literally pray for the strength to get through. Some days I’m a good mom and some days I foul things up, miserably. It’s like a rollercoaster ride, with lots of loops and turns… but when I start to feel sorry for myself, I have to look at how hard it is on him. After a year and a half of Psychiatric help, I’m going to try a new path. See for me there’s this persistent underlying question “what if I can do more?” A few months ago I was irritated beyond belief when our insurance company would not cover us seeing a homeopath. See I want to test for not just allergies but sensitivities; I want to check things beyond his blood sugar level and thyroid levels. I want to have someone look at him and really examine him, from the inside out.
So, I decided to make phone calls and found a doctor who is not insanely expensive who has agreed to work with us. This doctor takes a number of tests and figures out people’s chemistries and comes up with supplements that can accommodate anything lacking or create balance for any imbalances. I actually am in a support group for parents of bipolar children and one of the dads has had his son off of anti-psychotics for some time now, using diet and supplements to stabilize his son. Another parent has been able to use supplements in addition to her child’s medications, and has found that her child is doing very well. I am not trying to be too optimistic but it is a very exciting thought. I read the comments section of his website and was impressed with the number of people he has helped; ADD, ADHD, Bipolar, Lupus (which I might just have to look into later!)… the success stories were really reassuring.
I can completely understand people who are quick to say “children should not be medicated” in fact, I too felt that way. However after trying everything in my power, including counseling for all of us, I didn’t know what else to do. I wish I never had to put him on medication, ideally I would prefer to treat his mood disorder naturally. Now, should I find that prescription medications are going to be the best shot at my son having a “normal” life, then that is what we will continue to do.
I don’t think there are many people out there that opt to say “please, give me a prescription for my child that may cause problems with his liver, or kidneys, please prescribe me something that is going to cost us thousands of dollars a year, please subject my child to tests, and sessions, that they never want to go to…” but ultimately we all can only do our best, and I think at least the majority of people do act in the best interest of their children. Parenting can be challenging but through in rages, meltdowns, tantrums, separation anxiety, manic episodes, well it can feel like a nightmare some days that you just can’t wake up from. At the end of the day, you see this little person sound asleep, peacefully and you try to convince yourself it couldn’t be the same person who was screaming “I HATE YOU” just an hour before. You try to focus on the good days, but no one is perfect and some days it’s hard not to resent that there can’t be a normal outing to the park or mall. You wonder what it would be like to just have a day without being told you were hated or horrible- But then again, he laughs, he smiles, he says “mom I love you” and there is strength in that to go on.
People argue that a hundred years ago these disorders did not exist- this is possibly true… but the hormones that are used in foods were not around, the chemicals that are injected into animals grown to eat, the environmental components were not around… pesticides were not sprayed, cars were not jammed up on freeways, and gross polluters did not exist, antibiotics were not overly prescribed, etc. There are a lot of things around that were not prevalent a hundred years ago. A lot of things that could act as triggers for children.
I guess ultimately I am discovering that sometimes it is something deeper, does it still cause a mood disorder? Yes, but maybe, just maybe it can be treated differently. In the way that some people can treat their diabetes with diet, maybe we can find a way to do the same for our son.
I guess I just want to put to bed that omnipresent thought of “what if I just missed something?” I’m eager to be taking him to someone who is going to be asking himself the same question!
I will share our experience and what we find out. Hopefully we can learn things that may be of value to others as well!
No comments:
Post a Comment