T Ball and Therapy... what an eventful week!

So, the last week in recap?  We have been a busy bunch!  Martial arts practice Monday, Wednesday, and Friday.  T-Ball game on Tuesday, practice on Thursday, game on Saturday.  Tre is doing amazing at sparring; I wish he could see himself, maybe he wouldn’t resist going so much. He loves martial arts but some days he just wants to do other things.  He is amazing though and I would hate to let him walk away from something he is so good at. I feel like he would regret it later.

Dominic loves T-Ball.  I watched him out on the field at his game. He was dancing, and flapping his arms. He by far is the most animated player on the team.  No, that doesn’t make him the best player but it is really funny to see him out there swinging his hips around, dancing. Except we had to talk to him about pelvis thrusts on the field, those were a little awkward to explain.  Thanks to LMFAO and “I’m sexy and I know it…” My oldest thinks that is the best song ever… It’s a case of monkey see, monkey do… and Dominic was the monkey “doing” on the field.  A mom looked at me kind of laughing and I had to insert some comment about busting out the dollar bills, she almost fell off the bleachers laughing.

As I sat watching him though, I found myself inspired by him. He was so carefree out there. He was in his own little world, just full of imagination. He was so happy, so alive…  I wish I could experience that feeling a little more often.

Then Saturday afternoon, Tre had his first meeting with a therapist. She was wonderful, very pleasant. Bless her heart. Tre had decided before ever stepping foot in the building that he was NOT going to speak to her.  And he pretty much kept that vow of silence.

Upon walking into the room, he said “Tell her mom, now!” I took a deep breath when she looked at me with her eyebrows raised, wondering what he meant.  As politely as I could, I tried to explain to her that he simply did not want to be there, that he was adamant that he would not be speaking.  (She had her work cut out for her). 

Before going in for our appointment, he did his best to try to fall asleep in the grass in front of the building.  See he’s been doing what I call a passive aggressive technique.  Such as right now, he is sound asleep on the couch, because he knows that is the only way I won’t try to get him to do more school work.  So that was his attempt at not going into the therapy appointment. Until I promptly shook his little butt awake and made him walk in with me.

She got him to speak no more than a dozen words in all the time we were in there.  She had a great approach though. After detailing all of our “Issues” she stopped and said “Okay, now I’d love to hear all the good things about Tre!”  which was a strategy I’ve yet to see anyone take.  So I made my list for her.  He kind of liked it too, I saw the weight lift off his shoulders when he realized she wasn’t trying to make him out to be a monster.

She kind of laughed when she asked me “So, is he oppositional?” I just looked at her like with a big smile and said “Well, yes, you could say that!” At one point he hid his face behind my back, so she couldn’t see him…  then he decided to kick back on the couch and put his head in my lap.  He got up, took my phone out of my purse and said “I’m bored, I’m calling dad”…  ah, the independence.

I explained “No, you cannot call dad, that would be rude, we are sitting here talking…”  But he decided to try anyway.  How’s that for oppositional? J  I’m kind of glad she got to see it though, because so often he is overly composed in these type of settings and I get the look like “What’s wrong with you? You’re son is fine!”

Then randomly mid-chat, he says “I want to go to the game store after this!” I said “No, not today”, which lead to a little debate. Then he wanted a game on my phone, and I finally negotiated and said that if he sat, politely, I would download the game when we were all done.  Something she said to me that I needed to hear was “You really have tried a lot, you must get really tired sometimes”, it was validating.  I sometimes feel really judged by professionals or worry about what I must be missing.

She did ask him what he liked to do and said that next visit she’d like to play a game or do something with him.  They decided to do some origami. He told her about the ninja stars he makes, and she said she would love to learn how to make them. She also told him that she knows how to make a few things, so she could maybe share a few tricks with him.  Then she asked him if he’d come back in two weeks, and he said yes!

Hey, it’s a small victory.  He said he’d go back!  He said he will never, ever, ever go in there alone without me.  I hope one day he is more confident but for now I have to just celebrate his willingness to go.  I was very relieved when he was agreeable about it.  So, it looks like every two weeks I am going to be adding therapy to my to do list.  Which hopefully will lead to good things.